Welcome to Smoking Cures

Dom Gittins - Love his site!
Schmokin'
Smokers die young, non-smokers die inexplicably
Smoking when pregnant makes you look fat
Smoking Kills : No shit Sherlock
Fags : They just confuse Americans
Smoking kills but war's more effective
Protect Children : Smoke the first half for them
Cancer : Posh boy's answer to "Can't smoke"
Make my day - pretend to cough !
Sorry it's my last one
Got a light ?
I smoke after sex. Wanna cigarette ?
Those aren't nicotine stains. My teeth are suntanned from smiling.
Marlboro Lights - They wouldn't sell if they didn't
If I didn't smoke I'd just punch puritans
I'm a chain smoker - chains last longer
Don't smoke ? What do you do after sex ?
Caution Heavy Smoker : The diet starts tomorrow
Not Smoking ? Well go and do it outside then
Pity me ... I'm an addict
Cigarette Butler : Frankly my dear I don't give a damn
... and don't forget the mints
My Mum asked the government to moan on her behalf
WARNING : Nagging gets on my nerves
Gonna die ? Have a smoke and enjoy it
Fuck it - I can't even spell emphysema
Advertise your mouthwash here ...
Coughin' Nails

Paul Leach - Graphic Design webby
Never give cigarettes to children - always sell them!
Smoking only effects people around you who breathe
Smoking charms those around you
Smoking Chills!

Tim Greenway
Be A Winner - Be A Smoker
Go on, Roll Another One

Sam Stitt
Get special seating at most restaurants
Smoking is harmful to children - help solve the overpopulation problem
Two words: Smoke Rings
Long painful deaths are in these days
Nicotine: no less addictive than riboflavin
SMOKERS ONLY chat rooms always full of winners
You can deal with assholes better
Stick your rizla here
Don't Drink and Drive, Smoke and Fly!

Eddie van Dorland
SMOKING HARMS IF YOU DON'T GIVE YOUR MATES ONE!

Anthony Hughes
Smoking - still more acceptable in public than masturbation
Smoking deters women with crying babies sitting near you
Smoking - you too can sound like Madge from Neighbours.
Why be selfish? Teach your dog to smoke too.
Smoking can help you give up nose-picking
Smoking - you don't need to worry about a pension plan
Cigarettes - keep you safe in prison
Jehovah's Witnesses don't smoke. Don't risk looking like one

Daniel Storer
Smoking Is CoooL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mark
Sterility from smoking cures paternity suits
Smoking cough is attractive
Fatal diseases cure boredom

john bundy
It's good to be social

natalie myers, john bundy
It's a great way to waste 10 mins
filtered for your pleasure
smoking seriously decreases child abuse
smoking available through peer presure
smoking, its puts lead in your pencil
smoking ages the skin, gives you character lines, makes you look distinguished
smoking - who said i can't commit
relax unwind and feel refined?

Toby Richardson
You should have a 'menthol' section and a 'lights' section.
Nothing clears the sinuses like a Menthol smoke
Smoke lights when you can't handle full strength
Lights; the Huggies pull-ups of cigarettes

Ady
Smoke 'Em If you got 'Em

ray
Smoking : Gets you extra breaks

Steve Sutton
I am smoking a fag!
Ich bin ein smoker!
You want cancer? buy yer own bloody fags!
Only 400 poisonous chemicals!
I'm not an addict, I just like fags!
Lung transplant not included
I inhale.
Imported by British smugglers
Support the NHS, smoke a fag.
May contain traces of cannabis
Suitable for vegetarians
Say hello to my little friends
Smoking in bed may help you sleep

Fletcher
Smoking will increase the size of your balls

ana
SMOKING MIGHT KILL YOU, BUT NOT BEFORE I DO
SMOKING MIGHT MAKE YOU INFERTILE, BUT WHO WANTS KIDS ANYWAY?

Derek Brennan
Smoking makes you look hard as fuck

Ian Pilcher
Beagles love it - They cant all be wrong.

Alex Murray
Don't like passive smoking? Try the real thing, it's much better!

The BULL
KEEP YOUR HANDS BUSY

Alan Ward
Smoking whilst pregnant calms your baby.
Smoking...funding the NHS for nearly 60 years.
My cigs. My body. My choice.
Smoke more. You're going to die anyway.
Cigarettes. A drink's too wet without one.

neil
smoking seriously increases your number of friends

berni
smokers care less about their health and are therefore more fun to be around (ok I know it doesn't fit)
smoking - it's big and it's clever

James Mercer
It's Big and it's Clever

Peter
Look Behind u
fancy a fuck
My name is (blank)
oi oi lee sachell you bastard stop tryin to shag the birds and fight the geezers

Doc Blonde
Also available in C. Sativa and S. Divinorum flavours as well as original Tobacco. Try all three!
Share with your friends at social events
Actually, these's are my friends' fags, I don't smoke myself.

Luke
Suck on this baby
Smoking can help you get to heaven
Don't just smoke, toke!

Ben Thorpe
Just do it!
Smoking: Better than not smoking.
Smoking: What surgery was invented for.
Smoking, kills all known germs.

Chris Vernon
how about a collection of swap-able stickers... "great smokers" #1 = James Dean and soforth?
hey, it's only cancer!
let's face it kids, you want to smoke because it's cool

snella
Passive smoking: if ya gonna die ... take someone with ya !

Jon Hopkins
Santa brings children who smoke more presents
Pensions are cheaper for smokers
£3.37 from the pack donated to the NHS and other good causes

Jaymie Caplen
Second hand smoke causes second hand coolness

John
SMOKING MAKES YOU LOOK BIG AND CLEVER

Cuz
A ciggarette can be enjoyed with an alchoholic beverage.
Breath smoke into peoples faces so they can enjoy your smoke too
Extra light ciggarettes are for fannys

STEVE
FAILURE TO COMPLY WITH SMOKING CAN MAKE YOU SERIOUSLY UNCOOL!!

Chris Aberg
A fag a day helps you work, rest and play
SO WHAT!!
I'm sponsored by cancer research
I don't like the surgeon general anyway
This week, I have been mostly smoking...
You don't like smokin - I DONT Belieeve it!

William Pugsley
Chain smoke: Your treasury needs you.
Your treasury needs you: Light up NOW!

Unknown
Smoking - the art of sucking and blowing


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©2003 Chris Pollard, Tom Matterson, Matthew Pollard, Richard Smith & Ian